Rosemary's Bedroom

I still haven't decided on where to live or what to do next, and Regan says well, Rosemary's going to Boston, why not come back here for the weekend and sleep in your old bedroom?

It's strange being back in the cottage. My towel is still in the bathroom, and there's a long rail of beautiful clothes where my desk used to be. Rosemary said make yourself at home, help yourself to whatever you want, but I'm too apprehensive about being back here to touch anything. I put my bags down softly, close the door behind me, and then just lie on the bed for a while in what is now Rosemary's bedroom.

I used to live here with David and Fiona, over a year ago, after falling madly in love with them. They kept the house open to a steady stream of people, and Fiona — whose special superpower is chatting — would hold court while David started cooking. Usually I'd join them and share their friends with them; other times I'd be happy to stay at my desk, hearing their laughter come in from the kitchen. Sometimes Lola would come in to me with her tail thumping and we'd sit here quietly together: me working; dog panting.

Fiona liked to play guitar, and I liked to piggyback off her talent and talk about starting a band. We'd sit up late together playing and singing, but mostly she'd take care of the music and I'd get busy designing the tour posters and the fame and the glory. Fergal once asked had we ever recorded? Fiona said YES! and David laughed and said guys, just because you once made a webcam video of yourselves for YouTube doesn't make you actual recording artists. And then we laughed too and made up another stupid song.

But people grow up and move on. When they told me they were having a baby they took care to break it to me gently. “Maybe,” Megan had teased me, “they'll take you for a day out at Alton Towers so you know you're still special.” They got married, packed up and left for America, and I moved across town to live with a man in Portobello.

Yep, people grow up and move on, and sometimes it works out, and other times you end up remembering things very carefully, up in Rosemary's bedroom.