Annie Rhiannon

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

If your boss were Canadian, would you be afraid of him?

Ciara wants a new boyfriend but she's never going out with an Irish guy again — ever! She's done with them. They're sexually repressed and have no sense of romance or adventure.

I open my mouth to disagree, then close it again when I remember we're talking about her for a change and not me. But isn't it a little restrictive, ruling out an entire race like that? Especially the Irish, considering a) she is Irish and b) she lives in Ireland.

"Well," she says. "What about that time you said you were only dating men with American accents?"

Well yeah, that was a little restrictive too. Especially considering we don't "go on dates" in this country. Maybe if I'd declared that I was only going to roll into bed drunk with guys with American accents I might have stood a better chance. Although, in fairness to me, I was including Canadians all along.

"Ugh," says Ciara, who is not in the best of moods today. "Canadians."

Ugh Canadians? What does she mean ugh Canadians? Canada is the world's most popular country! Everybody loves Canadians.

"Not me," she says. "They have no power. No authority. Think about it: if your boss were Canadian, would you be afraid of him?"

I think about it. I picture us laughing at the water cooler, him in a baseball cap, me asking curious questions about the Rockies.

"No," I admit, eventually. "I don't suppose I would be."

21 comments:

  1. What if your boss were William Shatner? Or Neil Young, he's a bit scary.

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  2. Neil Young? Scary? What planet are you from? He's lovely.

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  3. Anonymous29.6.10

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_TfBbR6L0M

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  4. Why assume your Canadian boss would be a man Annie? I'm disappointed with you....

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  5. it was her, not me

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  6. alright, alright, I'm a bad feminist, I know :(

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  8. What if s/he were French Canadian, eh?



    ps I once did have a scary Canadian boss but he was actually an immigrant farmer from Flanders.

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  9. I LEFT Canada to get away from bland Canadian men. I totally understand your friend. Europeans are so much better: sexier, more imaginative and more charming.

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  10. No! Not bland! "Laidback". "Chilled out". Mostly lumberjacks. Pine trees and mirrored lakes. Etc.

    And if they're French Canadian then they're sexy AND laidback, obviously.

    Alright Tim, point taken.

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  11. That's the most offensive thing I've read in recent memory. A man couldn't get away with saying he's done with Irish women because they're egomaniacal and love to over-dramatise the life of themselves and their partner for their own amusement.

    For the purposes of this argument, naturally...

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  12. Wolverine is Canadian.

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  13. yes, bad feminist AND sexist AND egomaniacal.

    terrible week

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  14. A wonderful Canadian feminist, June Callwood, said it all about Canada when she wrote: "The beaver, which has come to represent Canada as the eagle does the United States and the lion Britain, is a flat-tailed, slow-witted, toothy rodent known to bite off its own testicles or to stand under its own falling trees."

    The only scary things in Canada are hockey goons. Especially the French-Canadian ones, who'd frighten the bejaysus out of Godzilla.

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  15. "Wolverine is Canadian"

    Are you saying Canadians are fictional comicbook characters? ;-)

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  16. Ok I can't let this string of comments go without suggesting that first of all, the idea of not living in fear is, as far as I, as a Canadian and an Irishwoman, am concerned, a good thing. Secondly, two of the most terrifying people I have ever worked for were two of my (female) Canadian bosses. For what it's worth. Picture grown men in tears (hockey heads included). And thirdly and lastly, am married to a very sexy Canadian man who doesn't resemble a beaver in any way. Voila!

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  17. Being Canadian (& Irish) and female and a boss I gotta say I don't think I'm very scary ... I like to think that's a good thing! Isn't the stereotypical Canadian laid back mode great for a boss, who wants scary! Best of luck to your friend writing off the men in your country is a tough choice, is she considering emigrating?

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  18. My Newfie is Canadian - if ever I want to annoy the life out of him I just call Canada 'America Lite'. Never fails :-)

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  19. I'll tell you who is scaring me. Tim is. Brrrr.

    Leonard Cohen might be a bit scarily intense. ("I'm not cross with you. I'm just so very very disappointed...") Anyway Tim wrote the book on that too.

    Moxy Früvous though. Quite happy to have him/them as my boss.

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  20. Nic: funnily enough, she is considering going to Canada to "climb their Rockies".

    Tessa: Canada gets the beaver, Wales gets the leek.

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  21. Being a Canadian (who coincidentally lives right next to the Rockies), I can highly recommend it.

    And, yes, Wolverine... *sigh* ;)

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